Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Good intentions

A few years ago for Valentines I did a countdown starting February first. Each day I did something spectacular... heart-attacked the apartment, brought home a dozen roses, made a romantic candle-lit dinner, gave my husband some intimate gifts, and stuff like that. It was fun.
I wanted to do something spectacular again this year. If you've encountered the 5 love languages, you'll already know that they are:
  • acts of service
  • words of affirmation
  • gifts
  • quality time
  • physical touch
Gifts are pretty much not a necessary love language for either of us, and the bank account doesn't have room for daily luxuries right now; but I figured I could get in 4 love languages a day - with at least 2 being out-of-the-ordinary.
Words of affirmation wouldn't just be "thanks for changing Lizzy's diaper" or "I'm glad you're home from work I missed you" but they would be well-thought-out love notes in some daily theme.
And acts of service wouldn't just be an ironed shirt for work and dinner on the table; I mean, really, I do that every day so it isn't spectacular, right? So I made a list of projects that need doing... clean out the closet, organize the cupboards kinds of projects. Yeah, that would be spectacular, alright.
And then I could mesh quality time and physical touch, if I make a point to give him a foot rub or a shoulder massage each day, focusing some time on meaningful conversation or something devoted to him, then there you have it.
It's February 11th and Clinton has received 3 notes from me.
The kitchen is mostly tidy and the living room has gotten tidy a couple times this month; but my list of 14 projects... yeah. Not 11/14ths done. Not half done.
The bathroom got clean... because my darling husband cleaned it top to bottom.

I hate letting pregnancy be an excuse for short temper or failed resolutions; but it takes a lot out of a girl. I lamented my terrible failure yesterday and he was confused.
Me: "I'm sorry I didn't do anything nice for you today."
Clinton: "What do you mean? you ironed my shirt, made the bed, cooked breakfast and dinner, took care of Lizzy, and did the dishes... on top of working a full day. What can I do for you? do you need me to rub your feet?"

I guess the Valentines countdown is a joint effort this year.

3 comments:

Diana said...

Ahh, this is a great post! Thanks for sharing it!

Tara Bennett said...

Oh Mindy. You are a jewel. Thank you for the reminder of the many ways to show love and affection. I think Clinton is a lucky guy, and looks like you're lucky too! Sometimes I think the simple things actually are the spectacular things. =)

Shelly said...

I love Clinton, can I just tell you that? Of course you're tired and moody and having a hard time keeping up with your intentions--you have a big baby in your belly, you have an active little girl to run after, and aren't you still househunting? I think your Val's ideas are awesome, though. I'm going to try it next year! You rock.